Happy Hump Day.....?

I'm a little more confused than usual this morning. So, please bare with me. Yes, I know it's not bare but bear, which in my humble opinion (I guess I could write IMHO) is another quirky characteristic of the English language. Bare can mean take off your clothing, while bear is a scary animal with great big teeth. Although, as you'll see below, bare can also be very scary.

The other day I read a news story about a lotto winner who dropped dead just after his win. I decided to pass on it then, but it keeps getting better.

The widow of a Chicago lottery winner who died of cyanide poisoning as he awaited a $425,000 check says she cannot believe her husband could have had enemies and that she has no idea who in their family asked that authorities take the deeper look into what originally was believed to be a death by natural causes.

The authorities are now investigating the death as a homicide. No details have been released as to that investigation. His wife has spoken with police about the case and said she didn't ask for the additional screening. She would not talk to reporters about the circumstances of her husbands death, saying it was too painful to recall.

Did anyone check the salt shaker? Or the coffee creamer? Or the sugar? I guess I watch too many police shows? A character in one of them once said, "There are only three things to know when checking out a man's homicide. The wife did it, the wife did it, the wife did it." This follow up will be interesting.

Happy Hump Day is a reference to the five day work week. Wednesday (a day I consider misspelled, it should be Whensday) is the day in the middle. Get through it and it's downhill to the weekend. But, what if, like me, you're retired? Or like Wanda, you work four days a week? What is our Hump Day?

I truly had a rotten Monday, so, needing some cheering up I went to my brother Fred's funeral, it was archived on-line. The website lists the service for thirty days and today is one month. I thought it would give me some much needed closure. It did, and it didn't. Now I'm not thinking about watching the service, especially so as the month progressed.

Fred had four people speak at his service. The first was a representative from the Michigan State University school of Veterinary Medicine. My brother left the school a very large endowment. It's the least they could do. If I sound a little bitter, well maybe I am. In my life the importance of good friends and family can't be overstated. Taking care of one another is of utmost importance to me. I know money is a touchy subject but an institution that pays it's football coach $1.83 million dollars a year could survive with a little less dough. I have no cause to complain about this, it was his to give, he worked hard for over fifty years. I just wish the guy that spoke would have pronounced our last name correctly.

The second speaker was Carl Levin, the Untied States Senator from Michigan. He was eloquent in his remembrances of my brother. They went to grade school together. Fred cared for the family pets. They stayed in touch over all the years. Fred specifically asked, in writing, for Mr. Levin. Make of that what you will. Our brother Allen, the middle brother, spoke next. Then the Rabbi followed all with some very, very nice comments. I was pleased to hear him mention Wanda as well as my eight weeks in Michigan two years ago when my brother was so ill.

Every day I am more amazed by the things the computer allows us to do. A paraphrase from Facebook yesterday. If a person from 1950 dropped directly into our world what would they think about our technology? Maybe we would say, I have this very thin three by five inch device I carry in my pocket that gives me access to the world's entire body of knowledge. I use it to look at pictures of cats.

We live in wondrous times. Information and entertainment is at our fingertips or thumbs, depending on your device. Yesterday, wearing jeans and a t-shirt, with latte in hand, I went to a funeral service. Looking at pictures of cats is a lot more fun.

By the way, I would like cardboard cutouts, or maybe those football "Big Heads" to represent mourners at my service. Have a short slide show of my favorite cat and dog pictures with a prerecorded sermon extolling all my virtues (it'll be short). Get comfortable and watch on line. I only have one request, please. Put on some pants.