You know I use the expression to boot to mean in addition.
I've been having some trouble with second guessing myself these last few months. I have been overly concerned with what you will find interesting.
I think I need to get back to caring less and writing just what I feel.
So we walked out of the house a few days ago and Wanda noticed my car door was ajar.
a·jar
adverb & adjective
adverb: ajar; adjective: ajar
(of a door or other opening) slightly open.
"she had left the window ajar that morning"
synonyms: slightly
open, half open
"with shutters ajar, we got only a glimpse of the
morning sun"
This was the third time in the past year someone has gone through the vehicle looking for what I can only guess are items of value.
My car is a rolling piece of junk 24-year-old Plymouth Acclaim.
The poor thing has been sitting out in the sun for all those years. A strong wind blows peeling paint off its top. The headliner is falling down, the back seat is rotting, and the driver's window will not roll down. I do not bother to lock it. If you added up everything of value inside the car I doubt you would get a dollar. I have two rolls of toilet paper on the floor behind my seat because you never know what you may need in an emergency.
When Wanda brought it to my attention I was pissed. I felt violated. Someone was in my driveway. Someone was in my car in my driveway.
At first I thought about putting up a bright security light, a motion detector. But most of those are ugly and besides we have carriage lights on either side of the garage door.
Then I thought about a video camera but really, what for?
If I'm lucky I will capture an image of a person wearing a hoodie no one will ever find. So what am I protecting?
The day after it happened I saw a neighbor out mowing whatever you call the green stuff that grows in front of his house in the spring. I walked across the street to talk with him.
"Someone rifled through my car last night," I said.
rifle
transitive verb
1: to ransack
especially with the intent to steal
2: to steal and carry
away
intransitive verb
to engage in
ransacking and stealing
"Really? Someone shot it?" he asked.
I meet Ruth on line before our European cruise in 2007. She was instrumental in securing great air fare to London. We have kept in contact since. She is a very smart lady and has given me wonderful advice and help with various problems over the years. She recently moved to Florida and has been having problems with a very nosy next door neighbor she calls "Gladys."
It seems Gladys is complaining about Ruth's dog. She wants Ruth to follow the critter around with a paper towel to catch her poop. Now Ruth has done all her homework and knows the poop can sit on her property for a certain length of time. She is not the type of person to leave stinky piles of steaming dog shit out in the Florida sun.
But just to aggravate Gladys and I think deservedly so she has purchased several fake plastic realistic looking piles of dog feces'.
I think it's hilarious but her lies the rub.
Ruth left a link to the item and I clicked on it.
For the past three days all my advertisements on Facebook look like this:
Ruth has the dog poop, I've got the toilet paper, and we both have nosy neighbors.
Wanda and I went out to lunch on Sunday. We met up with our niece and nephew in the trendy city of Walnut Creek, California. It was a beautiful day, sunny and mild, close to 65 degrees.
I love getting together with family and there were a lot of people out.
Women should cover their asses when wearing yoga pants in public. Couples that breed two kids or more incapable of walking and use strollers as wide as Hummers should use bike lanes and stay off the sidewalks. And men taller than 6 feet should always trim their nose hair.
The was a guy in front of me on line at the restaurant who looked like he had a whisk broom growing out of his nose.
I must have looked a little uncomfortable because Nephew Ralph asked me what was wrong.
"The next time we get together can you two come out to our house?" I asked. "I'm really starting to hate going out to places like this."
"You are becoming a curmudgeon." He said.
Curmudgeons are not pleasers. You must not care about being
popular or liked. If that matters to you, go to therapy.
Curmudgeons are not crabby. We tell the
truth and some people don't like that. Tell Junior what you really think of
his writing. Tell Aunt Ida that she's got bad breath. Don't be mean about it,
but don't try to make everything sound pretty.
Curmudgeons do not follow trends. If a popular media figure says something is great, you don't care
for it. If most of the people around you like a TV show, gadget or movie, it
makes you yawn. You may need to try forcing yourself not to like what's popular
until you learn to think independently.
Curmudgeons do not shop.
Curmudgeons do not like new things. Poke around the attic,
garage or basement until you find that old thing you used to use, rather than
buy something new. Or borrow it.
Curmudgeons dress for comfort. Wear
things that feel good and let you breathe.
Curmudgeons do not go to fitness centers to exercise. If
forced to go by your spouse, go when the crowds die down and do not wear
spandex. Spend a lot of time in the steam room or sauna.
Curmudgeons go outside to exercise.
Curmudgeons tend to own pets. If you do not already have
one, get a dog, cat or parrot (that you can teach to curse). Pets give you
something to talk to when you upset the ones you love by being you.
Curmudgeons are not angry people. Never yell at anyone or
say things to upset them. Stupidity has its own rewards. Hold your tongue and
you won't be the stupid one.
Curmudgeons do not argue. Let people believe whatever
stupidity they hold onto and just walk away.
Curmudgeons do like to tell good stories. Work up some
good short stories that tell about interesting experiences you've had or people
you've known. Learn how to time them so they are never boring or repetitive. An
ironic twist at the end is helpful.
Curmudgeons have excellent senses of humor. Find the humor
in things you see every day. Smile or laugh and catch someone's eye
to share the moment.
I can live with that.
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