Oh Play Me That Country Music.

I apologize to those of you that receive this updated in your email. Yesterday some items were mistakenly published.

It isn't called Dick's for nothing.

A Seattle woman was arrested for assault and harassment after she dropped her pants and made a scene at a Dick's Drive-In location on Wednesday night.

Restaurant staff called police after a woman began harassing customers and refused to leave the establishment.

The woman became upset and then allegedly tossed a condiment holder and a charity donation box at employees.

Officers arrived and were told that the woman "pulled her pants down" and "performed a very lewd act in front of Dick's."

A California man was arrested on suspicion of commercial burglary charges after he returned to a fast-food chicken restaurant for lunch only hours after he had allegedly burglarized it.

El Pollo Loco workers recognized Daniel Lee Warn from security camera footage of the burglary because he apparently didn't even change clothes prior to returning to the restaurant.

He was especially recognizable in the footage from the drive-thru because he was wearing a hat with the cartoon figure of Homer Simpson saying Homer Rules and chartreuse running shoes with yellow laces. 

While Warn waited in line at the eatery, police were called to come arrest him.

Warn was sentenced to two years in prison last month, but was free as part of a post-release community supervision program.

Warn claimed he was only fulfilling his program responsibility. "I was just supervising the community like I was supposed to. I was checking for restaurant's burglary response."

Authorities also suspect Warn of burglarizing other restaurants in the area over a two-day period.

In order to help promote cancer awareness, a minor league general manager will sing "Take Me Out To The Ballgame" while getting a prostrate exam during the seventh-inning stretch of an upcoming game.

Andi Miloman said. "It's for a great cause and it's such an appropriate song." And here the metaphors abound. "The exam will be in the radio both so the folks will only see me from the waist up. I'll be the one in the front."

The club will also be handing out 1,000 foam fingers and 2,000 pair of rubber gloves.

A 97-year-old man ended up at a homeless shelter after he was evicted from a retirement home because of his ukulele playing.

Jim Farrell didn't exactly see eye-to-eye with management.

"Management continually suppressed my talents."

Administrator Vivian Valardi said. "Jim didn't realize some of the notes he played were setting the patients false teeth on edge. We also had to deal with several screeching hearing-aids, a bad CO2 monitor and two howling dogs."

But all is well, when local residents found out about the situation they began donating money to help Farrell find a new home. He will be moving very soon.

Community Outreach head Susan Winters said she is "thrilled Jim will have a new place to play" and added. "We have a blind harmonica player who is literally dying to jam with him."

Why is it called a fart gun? It has no smell.

A British inventor constructed a giant butt that he plans to use to launch an explosive fart at France.

Colin Furze plans to launch the fart with a propulsion device called a valveless pulse jet today around 6 p.m. British time from a beach in Dover. He hopes that the gigantic buttocks will release a noise that "can be heard in another country across 21 miles of water."

"This is the construction of the 16-foot-tall metal ass that does look like an ass which surprised me as my sculpture skills in the past have been terrible," Furze wrote.

"If the wind is blowing from England to France they stand a very good chance of hearing it," he said.

The fart machine, which runs on gas, has been recorded at more than 140 decibels.

Asked about his fart attack on France Furze said. "I don't have anything against French people. This is not an attack at France at all; it's just that they're our closest neighbors. If Norway was a bit closer then we'd be farting at them."

It's a warm feeling to know I need not worry about catastrophic events when some of the most scientific minds in the world are designing "fart guns." 

Oh Chuck, where is and when did you lose your sense of whimsy?

"I got so tired of her bitching and moaning about everything I decided to eat an asphalt sandwich. And you know I'd do it again. At least it shut her up for a few minutes."

A Washington man opted to dive out of a moving car instead of continuing to argue with his girlfriend.

When the man bailed out of the passenger seat of the moving vehicle, it happened to be in front of a police officer.

The officer observed the driver of the car, Alice Finley, accelerate away from the man while yelling at him.

After the officer turned on his siren and attempted to pull Finley over, she wouldn't stop.

The 33-year-old only slowed down long enough so that the man who had originally jumped out of the car could dive back through its passenger window.

Finley finally pulled over but she wouldn't turn off the engine or leave the vehicle.

She told the arresting officer "she didn't stop because she and her boyfriend were arguing. I can only deal with a few things at a time. Driving and arguing had me on overload. I couldn't handle a police stop too."

After a considerable amount of time the officer was able to evaluate the entire situation. 

Finley was charged with attempting to elude a pursuing police vehicle.

It's not a book plot by Stephen King but it is very appropriate. Drunk drivers should be attacked by their own vehicles.

A Florida man had to be taken to the hospital after he was run over by his own truck during an alcohol-fueled road rage incident.

Joseph Carl drove into another vehicle that was stopped at a red light.

Carl then hopped out of his pickup truck and began shouting and banging on the other driver's window. Before departing from his truck, the 48-year-old neglected to put his truck in park.

The woman in the other car was frightened and she sped off, meaning there was nothing left to keep Carl's vehicle from rolling forward. Carl's Dodge 1500 started moving and he "put out his arms and tried to stop it, but it ran over him."

When police arrived, Carl was stumbling and reeked of alcohol. Police found numerous empty beer cans in his truck along with an open 16-oz. can that was still cold.

The suspect told officers that he didn't drink and drive, so they asked him about the beers. He reportedly responded that "he was only drinking while he drove home."

After he failed a field sobriety test, Carl was taken to the hospital where he was treated for fractures in his hand and foot. He was charged with DUI and DUI property damage.

As part of Carl's sentence he will be confined to a windowless room where he will receive periodic blasts from a real fart gun while listening to a continuous recording of "The Little Drummer Boy" sung by Howard Cosell.

Stop back Monday for more news and views.