The home phone doesn't ring. It alerts us someone desires our attention. It makes a noise like a quaking duck with laryngitis. It can be heard from the furthest part of our yard. In the event I'm wearing noise reducing head phones and have my ears stuffed with cotton the TV screen has a caller I.D. readout. The lap top and tablet would too, if I enabled it. We have call waiting and call forwarding. It's damn near impossible to miss a phone call.
Wanda and I each have a cell phone. After more than two years I still can't tell my incoming text alert from hers. Text alert? I don't recognize my own ring tone when I hear it.
Wanda called just before 8 a.m. With very little preamble she said, "Do you know whose birthday it is?" I thought for three seconds. "What's the date today?" I asked, thinking it was required information. Made aware of the April 30 date I had to admit my ignorance of the milestone. "It's Bugs Bunny's, he is 75-years-old today." I thanked Wanda for the information and went back to my coffee. A minute later the phone quacked again.
"Now I'm not sure, Wanda said. This says he was born July 27, 1940. You should do some research if you write about him today." I'll say it again, it's a damn good thing we found each other. I can't imagine any two people having either of us. Conversations about Bugs Bunny are second nature here.
Bugs made his first film appearance on April 30, 1938 in the short cartoon "Porky's Hare Hunt." In it he had some of the later Bug's personality however he looked very different. His "official" debut was July 27, 1940 in "A Wild Hare." This was the first cartoon depicting both Elmer Fudd and Bugs as hunter and tormentor. It was the first time Bugs used his famous catchphrase, "What's up, Doc?" So 75 today or 73 in July, the choice is yours.
Damn it! Now I have a craving for carrot cake.
Think of the World Wide Web as a humongous library with a gazillion overloaded shelves. Everywhere you look from floor to ceiling are books filled with information. Some are helpful and entertaining while others are not. I love all the answers and information I find in cyber space.
Last night I found an article about re-purposing, a buzz word today. It's my opinion of course but I think using an old picture frame as a vanity tray is not very attractive. Then again, I never liked the crochet hat like pieces that went over the spare roll of toilet paper. You can spruce the frame up with material or colored paper, but why? Just give the picture frame away and if you must have a vanity tray, buy one.
Another suggestion is use a Twister Mat as a tablecloth. Really? The last time anyone played Twister was twenty years ago. Why do you still have it in your closet, or attic, or garage? Now someone has the great idea of putting something that had bare feet, hands, and asses, (well maybe not bare asses unless you were playing Naked Twister which is a discussion for another day), all over it. And you're going to serve food on this? Ya, this is a great idea.
Use a toothbrush as a corn cleaner: A couple of things here. This article is supposed to be about re-purposing, not waste. I'm guessing the author isn't suggesting a used toothbrush. Now that you have opened a new toothbrush, do you really need it to remove corn silk? Use your hands for gods sake.
Here is a cute party idea: Put ice cubes in a colander set on top of a bowl or bucket. The melted water will drain out leaving the solid stuff for guests. Great unless you're serving pasta.
Stop searching high and low for hair clips and elastics: Store them tidily on an empty TP tube. A few months ago I suggested using toilet paper tubes for binoculars, which is a much better idea. A hair clip or band often comes off with hair stuck to it. Do you really want to see a toilet paper tube with hairy rubber bands wound around it? I don't think so.
Pick up interesting cardboard coasters at restaurants and bars you visit along your travels: Punch a hole near the edge, thread some ribbon through, and voila: homemade gift tag. Nothing says I love you to the grandson better than a Hooters gift tag. Don't worry kid, the boobies pictures are inside.
Chalk as Moisture Absorber: Tie up a few pieces in cheesecloth and store them with your good silver to slow any tarnishing. You have "good" silver? Do you have any idea what it's worth? And you're eating off it once or twice a year. You can eat off plastic forks....sell that stuff and go on a nice vacation.
Vegetable oil will put a shine on leather shoes: But it has a better use, deep fried fish and chips. If you're in a pinch a drop of cooking oil will clean up dirty shoes. I suggest first press extra virgin olive oil from the Sardinia Valley, six point five miles northeast of the second ocean point lighthouse.
Tuck a few needles, pins, and thread into a matchbox for an instant sewing kit. You sew? Honestly, how cheap can you get? Go to the dollar store and buy a travel sewing kit.
And herein lies the conundrum: Man Gambles Away Life Savings At Carnival.
Nope, not about someone who went on a Caribbean cruise on a Carnival ship. This is a corn-dog deep friend candy bar carny. A 30-year-old New Hampshire man spent $2,600 of his savings trying to "win" an Xbox Kinect in a game called "Tubs of Fun."
In practice he was able to toss balls into the tubs but not when it counted. Now the distraught man is calling foul. "It's not possible that game wasn't rigged," he says. The day after his big loss he returned to the carnival to complain. After talking with the man running Tubs he was given $600 and a stuffed Rastafarian-style banana. Still upset he says now he may sue.
So what's worse? A 30-year-old man who has a life savings of $2,600. A 30-year-old man who pissed away $2,600 trying to win a $350 game console. Or a 30-year-old man who actually told people he did it.
For more amusement Google: man gambles away life savings. There are so many out there. My God, I like my life.
No comments:
Post a Comment