Help!

Good Morning.....I feel like this desk.

I asked all the neighbors, I did a Google, I called every charity I could think of; no one wanted the desk. By the way, does it look heavy to you? The slide out that holds a keyboard (what's a keyboard?) weighs 14.5 pounds alone. You can see what we had sitting in the computer tower and printer area over the last eight years.

And file drawers? Who needs file drawers?

Everything is in the cloud.

At least someone wanted the over sized chair.

And last Wednesday afternoon I heard a chirping noise in the house.

We do not have a parakeet, we don't even have a unikeet.

What we do have, I've since found out, is an antiquated home alarm system.

Hi Charles,

Thank you for the opportunity to work with you on some options to upgrade your system. At this time, we are pleased to offer the following options to upgrade your system:

1. Upgrade 1-panel, 1-keypad, 1-cell communicator, 9-wireless contacts, 1-wireless motion and 2-wireless smoke detectors at no charge, additional $34.23 a month ($65.00) on an updated agreement.

2. Upgrade 1-panel, 1-keypad, 1-cell communicator, 9-wireless contacts, 1-wireless motion and 2-wireless smoke detectors at $399.00 down, additional $23.23 a month ($54.00) on an updated agreement.

The difference is, the more money you put down, the less the monthly is and the less money put down the high the monthly rate would be. We can try other options as well. Please note, your current  panel is older and you have some wireless devices tied to it. The parts are now obsolete. So we would need to upgrade to a newer model. When doing so, we will need to replace all the existing wireless devices as well as they are not compatible with the new system. Please keep this in mind when shopping around. If you have any questions or if you are interested in one of these options; please do not hesitate to contact me.

Thank you and have a great day!

Our Xfinty "contract" is up in July so I have television, Internet and home phone service to consider.

And I really need to make some decisions about updating our cell phones.

If I was an ostrich........