I'm Shocked.....

I have a morning routine. 

Just before she walks out the door Wanda shakes my foot. I get up, brush my teeth and set up the Wii. I do at least thirty minutes of aerobics while watching "The Sopranos." I wash the morning dishes and make a latte. I shower, get dressed, and start the lap top. I check e-mail, post on two message boards, and open the blog.

I just noticed my fly is wide open once again. I wonder if there's a market for Velcro penis outlets?

Recently, some US cohorts have shown a moderate association between red and processed meat consumption and mortality supporting the results of previous studies among vegetarians. The aim of this study was to examine the association of red meat, processed meat, and poultry consumption with the risk of early death in the European Prospective Investigation into Cancer and Nutrition (EPIC).

What a surprise! Hot dogs and baloney can kill you. Scientists found a significant association between processed meat and premature death and they weren't even looking for it. 

The studies original finding was that the consumption of processed meat went along with other unhealthy lifestyle choices, such as drinking a lot of alcohol and eating fewer fruits and veggies.

Researches estimated that a small reduction in daily processed meat consumption could prevent premature death. By the way, processed meats include, bacon, sausage, hot dogs and sandwich meat. Poultry and rabbit did not have the same effect.....Rabbit? When is the last time you ate a rabbit? The Easter Bunny is a rabbit and the White Rabbit too. Bugs and Roger are both rabbits. Don't forget Thumper and The Energizer. Jeez, eat a chicken OK, but a rabbit? Especially this time of year! Awful.

On the other hand, those who ate little-to-no processed meat, such as beef or pork, were found to have higher all-cause mortality than those who ate these foods in moderation. Researchers believe this is due to the vitamins and nutrients in red meat, such as iron, zinc, and essential fatty acids.

What does all this mean? Drinkers find grocery shopping and cooking much too difficult and eat whatever is in the fridge. So, remember what your father and mother always said. "Hey kid, gimmie a beer and eat your vegetables there are people starving in Europe."

What do mothers guilt their kids with these days, Afghanistan? 

Younger Daughter Rebecca can use our help. She has Rheumatoid Arthritis and is doing a fund raising and awareness walk. Please check out this link for a much better explanation than I can do here. You probably have a favorite cause, Breast Cancer and the Animal Rescue Foundation are two of ours. Just this morning I've been asked for donations from a political party, a politician, The National Railroad Association and AARP. Our dollars only go so far but I'm asking those of you that enjoy the daily blog to help with whatever you can, no amount is too small, thank you.

Because I just love these:

A $3 bowl bought at an upstate New York yard sale in 2007 sold at a Sotheby's auction for $2,225,000.

The 'Ding' bowl (you flick it with a fingernail and it sounds like....ding) is an example of Northern Song Dynasty pottery and described by Sotheby's as "remarkable and exceptionally beautiful." The bowl is 1,000 years old and measures just 5 inches in diameter. Prior to the auction it was valued between $200,000 and $300,000.

It's a fucking bowl. It's five inches in diameter, it wouldn't hold a decent amount of quinoa (rice wouldn't be politically correct). 

I bet the farm the first thing Wanda thought was, "I wonder if they went back and gave some money to the original sellers?" Because that's exactly what I thought. She and I are like two peas in a pod, two eggs in a basket, two thoughts in a brain....many times I've said that Wanda and I have one brain between us. 

Once again I'm using the blog to complain. This isn't the first or even the second time I've addressed this. But before I do I have a question.

The blog is my voice but you read it. So am I writing or saying something to you? OK, that's it, back to my complaining.

Yesterday I went up to Safeway, now here's something else...'I went up to Safeway.' Not, I went to, but I went up to. The store is about a mile and a half southwest of us. I should say (or write) I went down and over to Safeway. That is if you consider north up and south down, which I do. 

Yesterday I went down and over to Safeway for a prescription and Fuji apples. My first stop was the pharmacy. Maintaining the obligatory distance for customer privacy I got on line. Waiting is measured in basketball time and I stood there about eight minutes and nothing happened. 

The pharmacy clerk was talking to the customer at the window, the pharmacist, and the other clerk. At one point the customer went from the 'pick-up' window over to the 'drop off' window and I got excited. But she came right back and still, nothing happened. 

With privacy laws and all the rules and regulations in place, maybe one customer at a time is the way the pharmacy must conduct business? You can't buy allergy medication without a picture I.D. and your first born child. Picking up certain items require a short discussion revealing your address, phone and mother's maiden name. So, maybe it is only one person at a time? But that seems preposterous. 

Almost my entire time in purgatory I was was thinking; ask her to step away for a minute and get my medicine, how hard is that? That only compounded my aggravation since it wasn't going to happen. I was near the floral department and should have been meditating on the flowers. Take my own advice, stop and smell the roses, as it were. Finally, it was my turn which took all of ninety seconds. Then it was off to the produce department.

I had five apples in a plastic bag. I stood behind a woman who unloaded her entire shopping cart without once making eye contact. She had $71 worth of groceries and wrote a check. I spent $1.72 and had cash. I was not in the '15 and under' line, I accept that. Because Wanda and I always, always, always check behind us doesn't give me the right to expect it from others.

We need to pick and choose from many things that need our help and participation. There's only so much we can do with our time and money. The awareness and acknowledgement of a fellow human being in a supermarket check out line is easy. I'm not trying to make a mountain out of a mole hill.....but, you've got to start somewhere.