I Have Too Much Of What?

I was driving home this morning thinking how much is too much? Is having a lot of something always good? Sometimes it is and sometimes it's not. The first thing that comes to mind is money. Wanda and I have often talked about how much fun it would be to give it away. The next time the lottery hits two or three hundred million we'll buy a few tickets and dream again.

What about weight? Too much weight is not good. Wanda and I are working hard to lose a few pounds before the cruise and so far, so good.

This morning I had a dentist appointment. As you probably know, Wanda works for a dentist and that's good. My appointment was for a cleaning. The hygienist told me I had very little plaque and very little tartar, that's good. She also told me I have the most virulent bacteria she has ever encountered. That's bad.

I have two different electronic toothbrushes. The kind that vibrate faster than a hummingbird moves it's wings. I have trays that hold special toothpaste. At night I wear these over my teeth. I have a tool with a rubber tip, plastic toothpicks with a small brush on one end, dental floss, and a threader that goes under a bridge. I use some, or all, these dental devices every night.

I still have the most virulent bacteria the hygienist has ever seen. Oh, she did say she has one patient like me, but he drinks Coca Cola all day. I drink a coke a year.

I have no idea why I'm so lucky? If I had to pick one thing I could have more of than anyone, it would not be bacteria. There isn't much I can do that I'm not already doing. Today I did get a prescription for another special toothpaste, now I'll have two.

I remember my Aunt talking to my mother about my teeth. Going to the dentist scared my mother. Apparently she wasn't just afraid of having work done but literally GOING to the dentist. I was much too old when I had my first dental appointment. I have recollections of having large, flat, pieces of cardboard jammed in my mouth. These I now know were x-rays. I'm also pretty sure someone had to sit on my chest during treatments.

When I was around ten or eleven I went to a dentist who worked in the back room of a store of some kind. There were no windows and he smoked a cigar while operating the drill. This was not a great experience.

I don't want to imply the lack of dental care I got as a kid was child abuse. I'm sure it was her fear, a lack of finances, and the way things were back then. Bad teeth, take them out. I remember thinking a root canal involved drilling a big hole in a tooth, inserting a sharp tool, and removing a root like those on a weed. 

When I was 22 or 23 years old I stopped in a store to buy some beer. I was carded and when I gave the clerk my drivers license he said, "I remember you, you're the guy with the missing tooth." "Hey, I said, it's not missing it's hiding." A front tooth, not THE front tooth but the one next to it was sort of squeezed out of my smile. 

When I was 22 or 23 I began a two year stretch of monthly orthodontic treatment. For two years I avoided crunchy peanut butter. For two years I avoided lettuce. For two years my mouth was sore. Occasionally A rubber band in my mouth would break and go flying into the air. Embarrassing when it hit someone in the face. It was a long and expensive two years.

This morning, after my teeth were cleaned, after an x-ray was taken, the hygienist talked with the dentist. He came in the exam room to talk about a treatment plan. See, it seems I have this virulent bacteria, the worst he's ever seen. Oh, except for the guy who drinks Coca Cola all day.

And as I'm laying in the chair (remember I trained as a nurse) the dentist began to talk. I heard blah, blah, blah, blah, tooth. Shh, boom, shh, boom, bridge. Yakatty, remove, remove, remove, ta-da. Then he said something about a 'flipper' and I'm thinking about that dolphin or whale guy. I have no idea what a 'flipper' is and like so many patients, I didn't ask. 

Before I left the office they made impressions. Not the, I think you have a terrible shirt on, but the put goop in a metal tray and ram it over your teeth kind. For now, if nothing gets worse, I'll start this work when we get home from Alaska. 

Before I left the office I said to Wanda, "You know what all this means?" Of course she did and I'll defer to her knowledge. She can tell me where I need to go and when. Sharing my life with Wanda is a very good thing. I hope she can make gruel.