A late start today so I'm thinking of a little rambling. The men in the family need some loose end tying. The two ladies, my Aunt Lee and her younger sister Belle need more time than I have right now. It would be very appropriate to say the Meltzer family was a matriarchy and not because the men died early. The women in this family have all been very formidable. So, more on this later.
Old joke: Why do Jewish married men die early? So they can get away from their wives.
Older joke: "Take my wife, please." Henney Youngman
Please, ladies do not be offended, there is a compliment hidden in the first paragraph. No, don't bother looking, trust me, it's there.
Wanda and I went to Lifeline Screening this morning. This was our third time over the last six years. I urge you to take a look at the web site and seriously think about their service. The ONLY thing that should be of any consideration to you would be money. Now, what's more important to you, health, or money? We have a good friend who I think would still be with us had she taken advantage of this company.
I had the first test finished then went over to the next station. While waiting for Wanda to finish one of the technicians was looking over my paperwork. She noticed something on the form and said, "Wh$&*** mumph mumble is &*,?" I had no idea what she was asking me, something about my book? I said, "Sorry, what?" She again said, Wh$&*** mumble mumble mumph?" Now I felt like an idiot, "Pardon me, Are you asking me if I want a hearing test?" She laughed, "No, what is your zip code?" I think they're missing out on some business.
We bought some new kitchen things. A few knifes, tools, pots and pans. Wanda was reading the use and cleaning instructions for the saute' pan which was NOT a non stick pan.
She said, "Cuisinart said don't use the "stick" pan on high heat.
He heard, "Cuisinart said don't use the Bic pen on high heat."
She said, "Did you put the twelve cents away?"
He head, "Did you put the tall fence away?"
While watching the HBO special, John Adams:
She said, "Was that before he was president?"
He heard, "Was that before she was pregnant?"
She said, "The movie "The Road To Bali" is on."
He heard, The movie, "The Rose of the Valley" is on"
She said, "Do you want a cordless phone?"
He heard, "Do you want a corner stone?"
Should I be concerned? A corner stone? Do you suppose that's anything like a head stone?
Today we finally are able to severe connections with ATT. A few years ago we bundled all our home communication and entertainment services with Comcast. At that time our home alarm needed the old phone lines, it no longer does. A nice young man named David came out today to install our new equipment. He has been with the alarm company since 1991. He was quick, efficient, polite. He also did a couple of extras that will save us a few bucks, thanks David.
Years ago we had a cable guy here because our signal was terrible. He did some work outside then needed access to the attic He went up, was doing his thing when I heard a crash followed by a lot of swearing. I ran into the front bedroom to see one leg sticking through the ceiling. This poor guy fell through all the way to his crotch, that had to hurt.
My Aunt Lee has a door in the back of a bedroom closet that leads to the attic. When I slept over there that was "my room" and I hated it. I would sleep facing the door with one eye open. I was so afraid something would come out that door and get me. Basements and attics, is there anything more frightening to a six year old?
A month ago we ordered a new fountain from a company on line. The price was good, the service was good, the shipping was free, the fountain leaked. I thought I may be able to fix it. Home Depot, twenty five bucks for material. Knowing what I know about what I fix I was hesitant to try before talking with customer service. I suggested the repair, or, replace the part that is leaking. A few days passed when we received an e mail informing us a new fountain was on the way. No, they did not want the leaker back. Maybe we'll have a garage sale this spring. Anyone want an old chair and a leaking fountain?
By the way, I do love the fountain but listening to it makes me want to pee.
I was looking for something to watch last night, tuned in to "The Tudors." I thought it was a program about classic cars.
I was waiting for a web site to load this morning. After ten seconds I started getting antsy. I am at the point of wanting this information at lightening fast speed. The first computer I used was so slow you could see the info loading a line at a time. You could go grocery shopping and return while waiting for some files. Now, if it's not here in the blink of an eye it's too slow. I am spoiled, no doubt about it.
Another reason why I love Wanda so very much. Remember the guy who always screamed at the camera in his infomercials? His name was Billy Mays. He has since passed away, a heart attack I think it was. We were playing TV roulette, looking for something to watch and ran across him yelling about the "Magic Sponge." He's yelling, "Magic Sponge, it soaks up one hundred times it's weight. You can ring it out, it never smells, and it's machine washable." Wanda looks over at me and says, "If you put it in the washer, wouldn't it soak up all the water?".............especially now since we have a low capacity front loader.
I'm going to make a latte', see you later.
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