Random thoughts and calculations

Growing up my mother called it "the linen closet" and usually I do as well. In our house it's at the end of the hallway, and often called "the hall closet." Although it has, linens, towels, cosmetics, baseball cards, games, toiletries, electronics, an entire shelf of tote type and messenger bags plus a few other things. It really should be called "the multi-use closet at the end of the hall."

I was prowling around in the multi use closet at the end of the hall and discovered things from my childhood, youth and young adulthood. I have one little box with many things that for whatever reason had meaning to me. One of them was a notebook filled with wisdom. The following, if you and I can stand reading them are notes from that book.

Many single people have the freedom to do whatever they want but no one to do them with.

Living alone I generated one bag of garbage a week. Two people living together generated three bags of garbage a week. Is it a correct assumption to think the female of the species generates more garbage than the male?

Living alone no one tells you to go to bed when you fall asleep in front of the TV, especially when the ballgame is on.

When a couple separate does the woman always get the personnel phone/address book?

Why do people who "never come here often" know many people in the bar?

When living alone the dog doesn't have to take the blame for "not so nice smells."

You don't have anyone around that can help if the adjusting screw on your glasses is loose. And, just why is it so damn small?

Dishes, glasses (the drinking kind) and silverware, you should only have four of everything. And make sure they all fit in the dishwasher.

Empty bottles make nice flower vases while glasses are good spider catchers.

You can find an iron in places other than a golf bag.

I thought substituting one word for another is called "a euphemism" I was incorrect, it is using a pleasant, or acceptable word for one that may be objectionable.I may be wrong again but I think what I'm looking for is "connotations."

An old broken down house is quaint.

A terribly small room is intimate.

When people try to get friends together why is it called "Fixing up?" as if something is broken.

And, why is the "has a good personality" thought to be the kiss of death?

When we watch foreign leaders speaking how do we really know what they are saying?

What can a seeing eye dog help with in a supermarket?

Why, when a sports figure passes a milestone record do the announces often say, "he shattered the record?" when he just beat it by one.

Why do they insist on attaching unusually large and overly obvious articles to public bathroom keys? Would you put a toilet key in your pocket?

Why does most every home in America have three boxes of almost empty probably stale cereal in the cupboard?

What do they do with all the fingertips from those figertipless gloves people wear?

Is the sign, "We lock up our gold and diamonds at night" really necessary in a jewelery store window?

Can you call a drink without the little umbrella exotic? And, is the umbrella worth fifty cents?

Why do people in crowds, like Disneyland, queue on line when they aren't sure what it's for?

Do people move and sit down on opposite sides of the table when playing long distance chess games and are making moves?

Do people that sniff drugs wear protection on their nose when sharing straws?

Is it a waste of money buying a "how to pick up girls" book if the first tip is "get a job driving a bus?"

At the quick check isle do you count a half dozen cans of the same price soup as one, or, six?

When a man asks a woman the "where is it?" question and she answers, "it's in my purse." does she actually expect him to find whatever it is he's looking for?

When a man gets the "it's in my purse" answer to the "where is it" question would he rather hear, "it's in my purse on the ironing board." and now, would you expect him to find what he is looking for?

When a man asks a woman the "where is it" question, do you think he would much rather have her just get what he is looking for? and to save aggravation, shouldn't she?

Do people that keep Kosher need to use two carts at the supermarket?

Tuesday is almost at a close since it's after five on the east coast. Wanda has an appointment for a hair cut after work, is it called a hair cut when a woman does it? I would say, I'm going for a hair cut while a woman would say, I'm getting my hair done. I guess.